Day 28 - A Kid in King Arthur's Court

 

Day 28 of my blog here and today I watched A Kid in King Arthur's Court. This also means that my first month is done, even if it is a short month. A Kid in King Arthur's Court stars the kid that's also in Rookie of the Year only he's older now. He's also kind of annoying now. He looks about 18 in this movie but still plays a boy. He even still plays baseball and he's still terrible at it and during one game an earthquake strikes and he falls into a fault line and ends up in the middle ages. This also features a younger Daniel Craig and the bad guy from True Lies. I wanted to like this movie but it's just not all that funny and it comes off kind of generic feeling. The kid falls in love with a princess and tries to show her inventions from present day and teach her some slang and there was probably a lot of potential there but I didn't see much taken advantage of. There's moments I guess but for the most part it falls flat. Also the kid is too dang old. If you're looking for something to watch with your kids you can do so much better. 

I'm gonna give this 2 blade rollers out of 5

Day 27 - The V Word

 

Day 27 and tonight I watched The V Word. I'll be honest I picked this movie because it was way short and I'm short on time today due to work and an awesome college hockey game I went to. The V Word is about a couple of teenagers who apparently like to play video games. They decide to go see an actual real dead person who was a friend of theirs. Well things go wrong and they stumble across a vampire who turns them. The vampire is played by Micheal Ironside and that's probably the biggest plus of the movie. The gore is ok as well I suppose. The characters, however, are cardboard. Nothings really well acted and there's not really any suspense or horror to speak of unless maybe you're 11. Just a dumb, cheap horror movie made for tv.

This gets 1 little girl middle finger out of 5

Day 26 - Rookie of the Year

 

Day 26 would be today and today I watched Rookie of the Year. Rookie of the Year is about this kid who has more love for baseball than talent. That all changes when he takes a digger and breaks his arm and when it heals his tendons heal too tight and he can now throw a "frozen rope" over 100mph! This is a kid friendly movie, but that doesn't mean it sucks. It's from a time when kid friendly movies didn't suck, plus Gary Busey is in this. Daniel Stern plays the part of a sort of misdirected guide to the kid as he gets thrust into the world of the big leagues and is always getting himself stuck in goofy situations. John Candy even makes an appearance as an announcer. This is genuinely a funny movie and I laughed out loud quite a few times. I don't know what else to say! 

Favorite scene would probably be when Daniel Stern gets stuck between hotel rooms.

I'll give Rookie of the Year 4 frozen ropes out of 5

Day 25 - Green Street Hooligans

 

I watched Green Street Hooligans today on the 25 day of this here blog. Green Street Hooligans is about Elijah Woods being a college student and getting kicked out because he has a douchey roommate who lets Elijah take the fall for something he did. So he movies to England to be with his sister and gets mixed up with some crazy football fans. They aren't so much football fans as bunch of hooligans who go out and get in fights with fans of other teams. It's a crazy world they live in, and soon Elijah is right there fighting alongside them. To say I enjoyed this movie would be an understatement. There's a lot going on in this movie and it's never hard to keep it straight. I ended up caring about everyone and when things got tense my adrenaline was pumping. The camera work is a little questionable sometimes during the fight scenes, but not quite as bad as the chase scenes in the Bourne movies. I don't think it's a huge knock because I only really noticed it once. The story here is enthralling and it all builds up and gets to such a boiling point that it causes almost everyone involved to take a step back and think about what they're really doing.

The bathroom scene at the end was probably my favorite scene.

This gets 4.9 traffic cones out of 5

Day 24 - Punisher War Zone

 

Day 24 here, reporting a viewing of Punisher War Zone. In this heartfelt narrative a man by the name of Frank Castle searches for answers and redemption after accidentally taking the life of an undercover FBI agent. That's all just a vessel for Frank to punch, shoot, kick, stab, throw and slice the bad guys. The action in this movie is pretty brutal and is really the only reason to watch this movie. I mean, how many times have you seen someone punch through a guy's head? Not many. I could probably count that on one hand. It's based on a comic book, but I wouldn't say it's one of the better movies. There's not a whole lot of story to really grab a hold of. That's ok though, sometimes you just want to sit back and grab some beef jerky, turn off your brain and watch people get their own asses handed to them. This is just a slightly above par action movie.

Favorite scene would probably be when he crashes the party right at the beginning.

This gets 3.5 Krispy Kreme motherfuckers out of 5

Day 23 - Paper Heart

 

Day 23, this blog is as old in days as I am in years and today I watched Paper Heart. Paper Heart is a movie/documentary about a girl who doesn't think that love is for her going around and trying to find out what love actually is. She goes around asking people on what their views of love is, from elvis impersonators to a gay couple to a biker gang. She hits up a diverse crowd. It's interesting seeing all the different view points on what the four letter word means to them. Along the way she meets Micheal Cera and they start having a little fling. The girl in this is awkward with a capitol A. This is a film in which you're not sure how much is real and how much is written. That's a good thing I guess because it seems natural that those two go for each other. This is just a nice, funny, heartwarming movie/documentary. I enjoyed it.

Favorite scene would be any of the homemade diorama parts. Those were cool.

I'm gonna give this 4.1 cheese pizzas out of 5

Day 22 - Body Snatchers

 

Day 22 and tonight I watched Body Snatchers. Body Snatchers is an older movie about an alien invasion! The aliens slowly invade by making a copy of your body while you sleep and then act as a boring copy of that person. Right away something sat with me the wrong way; the narrator. She is, at most, 17 and she narrates like some philosopher. Thankfully that's only in the beginning and the end. Other than that, this is a pretty decent movie. The aliens and their embryos are creepy. The families mother is creepy just existing, she looks like an alien. I was even nervous at a few parts. For being an old scary movie this is surprisingly good. 

Favorite scene was the bath tub part.

I'll give this a good 3.5 finger paintings out of 5

Day 21 - Lars and the Real Girl

Day 21 this blog is officially an adult and today we watched Lars and the Real Girl. This movie centers around Lars (go figure) who is really shy. Shy is an understatement, he's got some issues with physical contact and generally just stays away from everyone. He lives in his brother's garage and goes straight there after work. In an apparent method to deal with this he orders a real doll. He then woos this doll and they have a wonderful relationship. It is a bit quirky, but that's a-ok. I really liked how everyone helped him along, and treated his real doll as a person. There's actually no one being a douche and making fun of him to his face or doing anything mean, which I completely expected to happen. Even though this guy feels all alone, he really has the small town he lives in looking out for him. Parts are funny, but not haha funny. It didn't seem to drag or be overly sappy or anything. An interesting love story, one that a guy should be able to watch and not feel uncomfortable for doing so.

This gets 4 fake flowers out of 5.

Day 20 - 9

I watched 9 today on day 20. 9 is about these little robot doll creations that are all alone in a post-apocalyptic world. There's some other robots trying to kill them for some reason. There's also a mystery there for the good little robots to unravel as well. I felt myself asking "why?" a lot in this movie as the motives of the bad robots aren't really explained. At all. They must just hate life in all forms other than their own. Also the ending left me confused, not because I didn't understand what was going on, but because I didn't understand why. Unless I missed something huge or an entire scene somewhere somehow I don't get why things work the way they work and happen the way they happen. That's not to say this isn't worth watching, the art direction is pretty awesome and the cg is fairly good. It's a good movie to watch, but don't expect to really buy into everything.

This gets 3 weird talismans out of 5

Day 19 - Black Dynamite

Day 19 and my awesome girlfriend bought me Black Dynamite. I've been waiting to see this for quite a while. It's shot like an old, low budget 70's movie, so there's bad edits, shots that go on a little too long, mistakes and continuity errors. I love this kind of stuff so I was in heaven. Add on a really bad ass black man and you've got one A-Class entertainment experience. I just love everything about this movie. It gets better as it goes on. It's so over the top and awesome and bad at the same time. Tasty.

Favorite scene, probably all of Kung Fu Island.

easy 5 hair pins out of 5

Day 18 - In the Electric Mist

Day 18 here and now this blog is old enough to buy cigarettes. I watched In the Electric Mist today, starring Tommy Lee Jones as a cop with a tinge of crazy and John Goodman as a mafia guy that no one can convict. Tommy goes around collecting clues and such things from people in town. I didn't find this movie terribly charismatic. I kept getting the feeling I was watching No Country for Old Men when Mr. Jones is on screen as who he played there and who he plays here are somewhat similar. It's neat seeing John Goodman play a bad guy, he does a good job but he isn't very intimidating, but then again I don't think he's trying to. He's kind of a pussy cat for being a mobster. This is a decent movie I guess, if you're bored some day.

2.7 rolled up magazines out of 5

Day 17 - Cast Away

Day 17 brought Cast Away my way. Cast Away is a movie in which we get to watch a half-naked Tom Hanks fight for his survival on an island. It's better than it sounds. Tom starts out as a Fed-Ex guy that's a little too much into his job, to the point where he's leaving his girlfriend and family behind while he goes off to work. Work for him is usually overseas and requires a flight. On one fateful flight something happens and they all come down. He washes onto an island and then he's got to learn how to survive and what's what there. It's all entertaining, I never found myself waiting for a scene to finish or wishing the movie would just hurry up already.

Favorite Scene would have to be, hmmmmmm, when he first makes fire. I was rooting right along with him.

I'll give this 4 scrapes out of 5.

day 16 - Dirty Harry

 

If I was a boy and each day of this marathon was a year I'd be old enough to drive because I'd be 16. Today I watched Dirty Harry. I noticed that in my movie watching history I've had a sore lack of Clint Eastwood so today I took a small step towards correcting that. Dirty Harry is about a no-nonsense cop who spends the movie mainly chasing down one really ugly serial killer. I do mean ugly too, this guy must be made of wood from the ugly tree held together by snot rocket paste. He's got a really odd laugh too. Every scene in which this ug-o is getting hurt I was cheering on the inside. Dirty Harry does a good job handing over some hurt too. Except for one scene under a cross, which seemed a little out of character for the guy. This is an old movie and as such the pacing and stuff feels dated, which can make it hard to really get in to, for me at least. All in all here you get a bad dude cop and a bad guy that's not hard to hate and it's a fairly entertaining ride.

One thing I'd like to mention is the blood in this movie, it's so over done. I mean, sometimes it looks like candle wax. Just a goofy special effect from a by-gone era I guess.

Favorite scene would be probably the bank robbery.

Dirty Harry gets 3.8 yellow bags out of 5

Day 15 - The Goods

 

Tonight I watched The Goods. The Goods is about a sort of car selling A-Team that gets called into action to help a fledgling dealership come out of the red. Jeremy Piven stars in this, who I once saw in Boston Airport and didn't even TALK TO, but that's another thing. I actually enjoyed this movie. You can see in the poster that it's from the people who brought us the awesome Talladega Nights and the so-so Step Brothers, and I'd have to put this one between the two. There's always a little quirk in every scene to laugh at. This movie is full of that stupid kind of humor though, so if you don't go for that you won't go for this.

3.6 parachutes out of 5 

Day 14 - In Bruges

My two week anniversary and tonight I had the pleasure of watching In Bruges. This movie is about a couple of hitmen who have to take refuge In Bruges because of a hit that went south. Colin Farrell hates this town and the other guy really enjoys it because of the culture. I really loved this movie, it's got goofy situations, dwarfs, women getting hit, guns, laughs, tears and cool accents. I don't really want to spoil any aspect of this movie, even parts in the beginning. I'm finding it hard to actually write a review of it. Just trust me, go see it. I highly recommend it.

Favorite scene? The dinner scene, maybe the part right after back at the lady's room, or it could be the part at the playground, the entire ending, who knows, there's so much to love!

5 froggie jars out of 5

Day 13 - Nosferatu

 

Day 13 and how fitting, I watched a vampire movie. Nosferatu was originally made at the turn of the year 1200 before there was full color movies or spoken dialogue.  This is a very. . . classic movie. Even the not scary scenes are a little creepy because, since it's so old, the movement of people isn't exactly smooth, almost like it's missing a few frames here and there. I thought that was pretty cool actually. I'll be honest, it was kind of hard to watch this. It just wasn't terribly engaging. The music is well done, I must say. That part of it didn't feel dated at all. Nosferatu is a pretty creepy dude, even by today's standards. This is the type of scary movie I enjoy, one that is creepy and not jump in your seats scary. He only gets worse as the movie goes on, too. The real scary one isn't the vampire, however, it's the main character's wife. She's always got these really spacey looks on her face.

This gets 1.8 beautiful necks out of 5

Day 12 - Couples Retreat

 

Day 12, how can I introduce you? Today I watched Couples Retreat. This movie is, in a nutshell, four couples who go to an island and attend some couples therapy. How many times can I say the word "couples" in one review? All the couples (I need a thesaurus) have their little issues and things. The cast in this is pretty solid, as I'm sure you can read in the picture. Vince doesn't go overboard with his schtick either, which is nice. I gotta say, I was pleasantly surprised with this movie, it was actually funny in quite a few parts. It's also just fantastic to see Activision funding a movie like this and doing it so subtly. What you have here is a chick flick that the guys out there shouldn't shy away from watching as a couple.

My favorite scene is in the hardware store right at the beginning, you'll know why if you see it.

4 toilet displays out of 5

Day 11 - Money Talks

 

Day 11 here, and I had the pleasure of watching Money Talks today. Money Talks is about a hustler played by Christ Tucker who, through a series of unlucky occurrences,  becomes wanted for murder. Charlie Sheen, a reporter, is the only hope Chris has to clear his good name! This movie is super similar to Rush Hour, only not as funny because it lacks Jackie Chan. Chris is funny enough to carry most of the movie though, so as long as you're not expecting Rush Hour I think you should enjoy yourself. Charlie Sheen's character is sort of funny, in that he seems to know about everything because he's done news reports on just about everything. 

The main thing to know about is that if you like Christ Tucker, you'll like this movie. I do and I enjoyed it. I may even watch it again some day. Nothing revolutionary here, just a slightly above solid funny movie.

Favorite scene would have to be the auction scene.

This movie earns a solid 3.7 modula oolangata's out of 5.

Day 10 - The Great Outdoors

 

Day 10 people, this is a big milestone! Today I watched The Great Outdoors starring Dan Aykroyd and John Candy. The Great Outdoors is a tale of a father trying to give his kids the same experience that his father gave him by taking his family camping. It's also a tale of in-laws crashing the party. They have little misadventures doing the rugged outdoorsy stuff and some of it's funny. This is kind of an old movie so you have to bear with it a little bit, that's not to say it's bad though. I always get a kick watching old movies if not just to see what they wore at the time. While I was watching I felt myself getting distracted easily. It's just an ok movie for me. There's a story arc of Mr. Candy's son finding a nice girl and they kind of have a thing going on that's just painful to watch. The kid is a total dork and he's laying, or attempting to lay the smooth game on this girl and it just seems so out of character for him. That would have to be my biggest gripe. 

The movie does have it's funny parts and my favorite scene would be any where those rascally raccoons are getting into trouble.

3.5 shotgun lamps out of 5

Day 9 - The Hurt Locker

 

Hello again, it's day 9 and I watched The Hurt Locker. The Hurt Locker is about a bomb team that goes around and handles explosive situations, no pun intended, hur hur. On the team we've got a very tense guy, a guy who seems to be suffering from ptsd or something, and the team leader who throws caution to the wind. I didn't find much to really latch on to with the characters. Much of this movie is built on the tension of the situations this team finds themselves in, and it's a pity that I couldn't bring myself to feel the tension with them and I felt a kind of disconnect from the heavy parts. Not enough time was spent on the characters in my humble little opinion and it's not until the last 20 or 30 minutes that I felt any sort of connection to them. The film also falls into a pattern of they get called to a site or mission, things are tense, something happens, they talk about it a little bit then another site, rinse and repeat. It's also fairly easy to tell when something bad is going to happen.

Everything else about the movie was done extremely well, I gotta say. The city they're in, the base camp, everything seems authentic. I like the way this movie portrayed what they were going through. These guys get thirsty and tired and I liked seeing that side of it, it helps with the immersion. Sure there's some action but it doesn't feel like it's just an action scene to show off some explosions or keep the kiddies happy. There's always a reason to be suspicious of that guy over there, or that crowd gathering on the balcony. 

Favorite scene was the suicide bomber towards the end, I won't spoil it any further than that.

This gets 3 bootleg dvds out of 5.

Day 8 - Dear John

Day 8 and I got dragged to the movies. Today I watched Dear John. Dear John is about a soldier guy who is home on leave and falls in love while he's there. Channing Tatum is the soldier and he plays him with all the charisma of a cardboard box. He's just so devoid of any personality it's hard to really like the character which I feel is VITAL for me or anyone to really enjoy a love story. The girl he falls in love with isn't all that much better. Well, actually, she does have some personality it's just not very. . . endearing.

One thing I did like about the movie is that it wasn't totally predictable. I had two predictions in my head on where I thought it was going that, thankfully, didn't pan out.

Favorite scene. . . When it shows close ups of the moon. That was neat because it reminded me of my astronomy class where I looked at the moon through a sweet telescope and saw shadows that the ridges cast and it actually seemed like a real place then.

1.7 lasagna dinners out of 5

Day 7 - Heat

 

Today is my one week anniversary and I watched Heat. Heat is a cops and robbers tale of two forces of nature squaring off. Al Pacino on the cops' side and Robert De Niro on the robbers' and everyone is a bad ass. This movie lets you see into the lives of the major players and see the ripples a life like this creates, and the water gets quite choppy. It's a neat movie that way, there's no clear cut good and bad guy thing going on. The only real "bad" guy is on the sidelines for much of the movie. There's actually quite a few big names in this movie, but the one I liked seeing the best is the Allstate insurance guy. Heat clocks in at almost 3 hours, so if you're small time grow a pair or take some ritalin and watch it anyway.

The street shoot-out scene was awesome and takes the favorite scene prize with this one.

4.5 Allstate guys out of 5

Day 6 - Accepted

 

Today is day 6 and today I watched Accepted. Accepted is about a guy who just can't get into a college because he can't apply himself to his studies! Instead he squanders his intelligence making fake IDs. Pressure from his parents and a desire to please his dad push this fellow into using his knowledge in forgery and applying it to acceptance letters. So he fools his parents into thinking he's going, and then he's really got to sell it and he goes the whole nine. He leases a building, has a friend make up a website and what have you. He fools his parents but accidentally fools a whole bunch of other people in the process and now he has a whole student body to deal with. 

I actually quite enjoyed the movie, it's got it's funny parts. Yeah, it's a college comedy but it's not all BEERZ AND WEED N SHIT FUNNY MOVIE stuff, which is good because otherwise it wouldn't have been as good as it was. It wasn't great, don't get me wrong, but it's not a movie anyone should go out of their way to avoid, either. Plus some uptight people get their shit ruined, which is always nice.

This gets 3 shrimp slushies out of 5.

Day 5 - Pandorum

Today I watched Pandorum. This is the first movie in the marathon that I didn't like that much. Pandorum is a movie where the nazi from Alpha Dog falls down whenever he can. Seriously, he falls at least 5 times in the first 20 minutes. Well, actually it deals with paranoia and memory loss and how that memory loss feeds paranoia and it's a vicious cycle. That's all good but the way it's presented is segmented and choppy. I think it's the camera work and the direction that makes it so, the cuts are super abrupt. It takes away from the action segments for me. I'm sure they were going for a disorienting style but it didn't really work in a good way.

I can't really remember a scene that stuck out to me.

I'm gonna have to give this one 2 escape pods out of 5

Day 4 - Rock N Rolla

 

Day 4 and it's Rock N Rolla. This is from the same guy who brought us Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels and the timeless classic Snatch. This is very similar to those two in that it gives you this giant tangled story and all the goofs that play their parts. There's all sorts of sillyness here, and I love it. 

My favorite scene was when One Two and Mumbles(?) steal the car.

I did like the movie, but as far as Guy Ritchie movies go I'm gonna have to put this after Snatch and before LSaTSB.

This gets 4 lighters out of 5.

All good movies so far, how long can that last?

Day 3 - Hook

 

It's day 3 and today's movie was Hook. Hook is a more mature take on Peter Pan. It's told years after his previous adventures, he's become a lawyer, had kids and most shockingly of all . . . GROWN UP! 

gasp

I'm really not up to snuff on the story of Peter Pan, and thankfully you don't have to be to enjoy this movie. I had no idea of some of the love interest . . . stuff. I don't want to spoil anything so I won't try to explain any more on that. Robin Williams plays Peter Benning/Pan and does a good job and Dustin Hoffman is almost unrecognizable as Captain Hook. All the kid parts were acted surprisingly well. I think this may have been Carrot Top's first movie role as well.

My favorite scene was the imaginary feast.

Best line was "I just had an apostrophe!" Cracked me right up. 

This was a very good, fun movie. 

4.8 bangerangs out of 5

Day 2 - Oldboy

 

Day 2 and going strong. Today I picked Oldboy. Oldboy is about this guy who gets kidnapped for 15 years and he's not sure why. He also watches a shit ton of tv and kinda teaches and trains himself to get ready for his escape and inevitable revenge. He starts out as a drunk and seems to have some personality but 15 years of solitude takes it's toll. When he's released he doesn't know what the hell is going on, he's dressed nicely and on the roof with some suicidal guy and his dog. From there on, he kicks a little ass and little clues start coming in. By the end, one of the most creative plots for revenge is revealed. 

Favorite Scenes

1. Once he's let out he comes across a gang and he takes one of their cigarettes. They kick him down and he takes a tumble, but before he gets back up he thinks for a while and takes another drag.

2. The hallway fight scene.

This is worth a watch just to see why he goes through all the stuff that he does. Not to mention the style of it all, a good movie.

5 hammers out of 5

Day 1 - Crash

Tonight, for my first movie, I decided to watch Crash. I've been meaning to watch this for a while because I love movies with tangled stories like this. Crash is a movie about a bunch of people being racist for the first hour, then some of them get into situations and do the right thing, and a couple of the good ones get shit on. Some of the characters are so unlikeable for so much of the movie, but once something happens to them you (or at least I) couldn't help but to feel nervous or bad for them. The movie does a good job at giving the characters tough decisions to make. It's just a really complicated movie and definitely worth a watch.

I promise I'll get better at this.

I'm gonna give this movie 4 and a half blakes out of 5.